Nov 13

Why I am teaching my children about porn

The media last week was full of comment and reports that the National Association of Head Teachers had called for children to be taught about porn as part of the sex education lessons (see, for example, this report on the BBC News website). Inevitably this was misinterpreted in some quarters as something of tremendous danger to young children, as if the intention was to corrupt them and warp their understanding of the world by placing them in front of uninterrupted scenes from hard core porn movies for hours on end, and leaving it to them to work out what was right and what wasn’t.

I preferred to interpret it differently, namely as a call to pre-empt the almost inevitable, ie that children will see porn at some stage in their teenage lives, and we as their parents and teachers should prepare them to reject its harmful elements, and to put it into a values-laden context. A significant proportion of children will view porn, sometimes by accident and sometimes because through curiosity they have sought it out; they are often not prepared, however, for the fact that it can prove distressing and damaging, and they are certainly not prepared – given the vast weight of sexualised material they see around them every day – to be able to distinguish that women in porn are overwhelmingly presented in an objectified manner.

So – forewarned is forearmed. I have already started to explain to my pre-teen eldest child that there are bad things on the internet, and that despite the filters we put in place to stop this stuff getting through, he may encounter inappropriate images. I am trying to give him strategies – not to be afraid to tell, to navigate away from sites, to recognise that this is not real, and that the way in which women are portrayed is harmful to both men and to women, because everyone should be equal in the world. I am starting to explain that this is not always about love, which is what all great relationships should be built on.

There is of course a danger in telling children about porn – ie that they will go and actively seek it out. But no parent or school can ever protect children forever from the fact that bad things happen, and that women are presented in degrading ways in the internet. At least by preparing our children to know that it exists, to know that it is unreal, and to know that it can be extremely harmful to women, we stand a chance of being able to communicate to children that this is not what sex is all about, and we have the opportunity to share some of our values around sex, love, and how men and women should be treated equally in all aspects of life.

 

Nov 10

Why I love my legs

Every Saturday I read, avidly, Melanie Reid’s column in The Times magazine. Melanie was already an award-winning journalist when, in April 2010, she suffered a dreadful fall from her horse and broke her neck and her back, an accident which left her paralysed and without the use of her limbs. Each week she catalogues her slow and painful recovery, as she comes to terms with what she can and can’t do, and how- inspiringly – she is gaining use again of her legs and other parts of her body.

Reading her column makes me appreciate my legs even more. I love my legs, because not only do they take me to wherever I want to go, but they enable me to do one of the activities that I most enjoy – brisk, fresh, early morning walks. My legs are strong, capable and amazingly responsive. My brain tells them to go faster and they do, powering me on, raising my heart rate, keeping me fit, lifting my mood and clearing my thoughts. A fast, determined walk in the early hours of the day is the perfect way to set me up for a productive and wonderful rest of the day. My legs make this happen and I am proud of them. We should all be proud of our legs.

So it was rather depressing to read an article in the Daily Mail earlier this week entitled ‘The secret of lovely pins‘. This article reported the results of 12 years’ worth of analysis by a plastic surgeon, to work out what makes for the ‘perfect’ leg. What was notable about this article was that it concentrated entirely on the aesthetic – the appearance of the legs – and not one jot on their ability and usefulness. Moreover, the purpose of the study was explicitly in order to find “an ‘ideal aesthetic model’ on which to base surgery in the future”. Not content with reducing legs to their superficial outward aspect, the whole drift of the article encouraged its readers – primarily, I would guess, women – to question whether their legs were good-looking enough, and to think about changing them.

Well, our legs are beautiful as they are, because – quite simply – they are our legs. They transport us, they power us, they enable us to do whatever we want to do. If we lose the use of legs we soon appreciate them all the more, and we can still love them for what they can do for us. They are a part of us.

This is Positive Image month. This is the month when we need to tear up articles that make us question our marvellous and unique bodies. This is the month when we need to love our bodies because they are central to who we are.

I love my legs. Love yours.

 

Nov 07

Why teaching is like being on a log flume: new teachers take note!

Earlier today I had the privilege of addressing a group of NQTs (Newly Qualified Teachers) at a post-qualification training day. All of them are in post and all of them are working towards their final accreditation as teachers; support and training days like this one are designed to invigorate their thinking, give them time to reflect on their practice, and allow them to meet and connect with other colleagues.

I had three messages for them:

First, teaching is fun and deeply rewarding. There is no other profession like it, in fact. Teaching stretches your brain, develops all your competencies and grows your emotional intelligence. A deep satisfaction results from working with and for people, changing their lives, and helping prepare them for their future. As a teacher, if you throw yourself into your profession headfirst, immersing yourself in it, then you become a better person yourself. I compared teaching to the experience of going on a log flume at a theme park: you wait with nervous anticipation before launching yourself forward, at which point you speed exhilaratingly downwards, get drenched in water – and laugh with joy and exhaustion. Teachers – especially new teachers – should never underestimate the joy of teaching.

Secondly, teachers – in fact, all of us – learn best when they learn and work with others, and they are not on their own. In actual fact, they must not be in this on their own, because teaching is all about encircling each child with a collaborating group of teachers and coaches, so that he or she can grow and learn. Teaching is all about the child; it is essential for teachers to work together, not only to improve their own practice, but to understand the child from many different angles. Every teacher has unique perspectives on a child, and all teachers should learn from one another – there is much experience out there to learn from.

And thirdly, what teachers are doing really, really matters. Our society needs teachers to educate the young people of today so that they can go out and contribute fruitfully and positively to their society and to the world. Over a billion people in the world live in poverty; 1 in 3 girls do not receive a secondary education. Look around at our society and you will see so many areas which we need to combat – the self-esteem of our young people, their understanding of their role in the world, the requirement upon us all to create a harmonious, fair, peaceful place in which we can all live. Our young people need to learn to think critically about themselves and their responsibilities. Teachers can make a tremendous difference to our world.

Teachers teach so children can learn. They are teaching a child, not a subject. Their role is one of the most important we could possibly imagine. To all the new teachers out there, we should say: thank you, and bon courage.

 

Nov 04

A moving morning, and a strong energy to make a difference: Positive Image Month continues

Last Thursday’s launch of Positive Image Month, the fantastic initiative driven by the determined Kate Hardcastle, was incredibly moving. One after another, people told their stories – stories of being made to feel inadequate because of what they wore or how they looked, and dreadful stories of bullying so commonplace that it has almost become regarded as a right of passage. The message to emerge was strong and uncompromising: no-one has the right to be cruel or unkind to another, and we have to learn to value our differences and multiple beauties. And where this starts is with the self: a positive image begins with the individual standing up, casting off the shackles of media-manipulated expectations of what we ‘should’ look like, and saying “I like me”.

Early in the day, the fabulous Jenni Trent Hughes read to us from a number of daily newspapers and magazines, picking out the articles about image, weight, appearance and how much people wanted to change what they look like. She was not short of material – she had a bundle of articles, and I could have added to it from the magazines and newspapers I had collected en route, to explore the depressing nature of the messages that people are receiving from the media. It has been shown that a few minutes after reading fashion or ‘women’s’ magazines, women’s moods drop, and they feel less good about themselves; this is not at all surprising, when you look at the uniform – but artificial – ‘perfection’ of image after image after image in these publications.

So Ms Trent Hughes tore them up. There, in front of us, she tore them up and said, quite simply, “Stop reading these. They make us feel bad about ourselves, and we are better than that. Stop reading them.”

Positive Image Month is about seeking to make a difference – for ourselves and for others – and to learn to feel good about who we are. If we don’t feel good about ourselves, our capacity to act and do good in the world is restricted – crippled, even – and it is for this reason that I am a Voice in this campaign. Our young women in particular suffer from the pressures placed upon them to look and act in certain ways, and this affects even the most self-aware and grounded of them. Scratch beneath the surface of an intelligent and able 18 year old, and you will discover feelings of inadequacy – of not looking good or ‘hot’ enough. We have to change this. We have to liberate young people to just be themselves, and to be free to spread that positivity into all spheres of their life.

Throw away the negativity; embrace the positive. And do something today to help someone else see the light and make a difference.

 

Nov 02

The artists, the exhibition and their enriching legacy: what our former pupils bring to our schools

This has been an astonishingly creative week, as the St Mary’s Calne Art department moved to Cork Street, London, for a most beautiful Art exhibition. Pupils present and past exhibited, and the range of media and array of subjects was amazing. I could devote a blog a day from now on to each of the incredible artists, and I would still be here in several months’ time, eulogising. One of the (many) highlights was a work by artist Endellion Lycett-Green, who was a pupil at St Mary’s Calne in the 1990’s, and who had come back to the school a couple of years ago to talk about how she creates her works (see here for a report on her talk) but she was not alone – so many incredible artists, with so many astonishing works.

It seems almost unfair to select just one artist or group of artists, because every work was amazing (and – although I may be biased – the exhibition as a whole was by far the best in Cork Street this week) but I will say that the old girls who exhibited added an especially symbolic dimension to the event. Old Girls are hugely important in a school, and it has been one of my real joys that over the past few years the Old Girls’ Association at St Mary’s Calne – now renamed, most appropriately, just the “Calne Girls’ Association”, as testimony to the enduring, ‘forever’ nature of being a pupil at the school – has grown more and more entwined with the school as it is at present. More and more old girls (of all eras) have come back to school for reunions and to give lectures, and our communication channels with old girls – both ways – have grown better and better.

Former pupils are so very important in schools. They hold memories of the school’s history, they are useful guardians of the past, and they bear witness to the eternal strands of education that have woven their ways through the centuries of the school’s existence. Without former pupils, a school is only a shadow of itself, or of how it can be. A school is richer with the involvement of all those who have ever been part of the community – in fact, I would argue that once a member of the community, always a member of the community. The ties that are made with a school – a great place of learning and growth – can never be abandoned entirely, even though, without careful nurturing, they may loosen with the passing of the years.

The Cork Street Exhibition was fantastic, and each piece of work owed some of its beauty to the educational and life experience that its creator had at school. Equally, each piece of work has now contributed through its beauty and as a result of the educational and life experience of its creator to the depth of creativity that is present in the school today. It is a wonderfully virtuous circle, and it happens when former pupils remain engaged, and schools honour their involvement.

Long live our Old Girls.

 

Oct 29

Positive Image Month launches on 1st November!

If you have a moment between now and Thursday, look at this website. Positive Image Month is the brainchild of Kate Hardcastle, the well-known entrepreneur and businesswoman, who just felt that collectively, we had to do something to try to rebalance the terrible weight on people in our society (especially young people, and especially women) to look, appear and act in certain ways. Poor self-image is at the root of so much unnecessary agonising, and it stands to reason that the poor self-esteem that results is a limiting factor on people achieving their full potential.

Consider some of the facts:

  • More than 90 percent of girls – 15 to 17 years – want to change at least one aspect of their physical appearance, with body weight ranking the highest.
  • Girls’ self-esteem peaks when they are 9 years old – just 9!
  • 80% of children who are 10 years old are afraid of being fat.
  • Obese boys and girls have significantly lower self-esteem than their non-obese peers.
  • Nearly a quarter of girls age 15-17 would consider undergoing plastic surgery – a frightening thought.
  • 13 percent of girls age 15-17 acknowledge having an eating disorder.
  • 7 in 10 girls believe they are not good enough or do not measure up in some way including their looks, performance in school and relationships.
  • 80% of 10-year-old girls have dieted.
  • Young girls are more afraid of becoming fat than they are of nuclear war, cancer, or losing their parents

Jo Swinson MP’s All Parliamentary Body Confidence Report, which came out earlier this year, concluded that “Body Image dissatisfaction in the UK has never been higher”, and it is blighting the lives of hundreds of thousands of people a year. We do not want this – no sane society can possibly want this – and we have to do something about it.

This coming month, let us step up to the mark and do something positive for our body image and the body image of others. Let us help ourselves and others realise that it is what we do and who we are that really matters, not what we look like. It is time to break free of the shackles of negative self-perception and realise our true potential.

Enjoy just being you this month … and do your bit to help others just enjoy being who they really are. Spread the word.

 

Oct 26

Fanning the new with the flames of the old: Livery Companies today

Last night in London I had the tremendous pleasure of being the Principal Speaker at the Selection Dinner of the Worshipful Company of Fan Makers. It was a super evening – convivial company, and an opportunity to talk about areas of mutual interest in education and the wider world, and I was very struck – again – by the enormous goodwill and determination that exists in Livery Companies to want to make a difference in the world.

The Worshipful Company of Fan Makers is the youngest of the ‘old’ City Livery Companies, as it was the last to receive a Royal Charter rather than being incorporated by the City of London alone. Company records from the early days are scare, but it is clear that the Company, although incorporated in 1709 during the reign of Queen Anne, was very active as the ‘Guild of Fannmakers’ from at least the reign of Charles II.  Livery Companies are fascinating, in fact, and well worth pausing for a moment to think about. Many had their origins back before the Norman Conquest, and grew out of a need to check and assure quality of goods, which is why different trades developed different guilds, which in turn became livery companies (the ‘livery’ refers to the clothing they wore as a means of identification).

From the outset, it made perfect sense for these Livery Companies to take a real interest in, and responsibility for, the education and training of young people as apprentices. This ensured quality, and enabled young people to earn a good living and provide for themselves and their families. Today, this commitment to education continues, and is alive and well. With some Livery Companies it is more visible than others – those who have benefited from trusts and endowments which have enabled them to set up schools, for instance, but the commitment to training and developing young people is very much central to the life of all the Livery Companies.

When you sit in one of the halls of the great ancient Livery Companies, and survey the history around you, you connect with the past across many, many generations, and when what you find is a shared desire to educate young people and prepare them for the world, then this is incredibly affirming of our present day activity as educators. Our present, reaching out to our as yet undiscovered future, is strengthened by the knowledge that our ancestors, centuries ago, were engaged in the same human desire to help others and to make a positive, strong difference. Rigour and aspiration went hand in hand, just as today they should go hand in hand as we seek to prepare our young people to make the very most of themselves, and to enable them to have a positive impact on their world.

History connects us all, and a history of education and the desire to do well for others connects us especially. What a pleasure it was to be reminded of that last night.

 

Oct 23

Where Art becomes grotesque reality in the female form

If you have a spare 6 minutes, go to this YouTube link and watch a video of Ukrainian teenager Anastasiya Shpagina applying make-up to one of her eyes. She is doing so to give the impression that her eye is larger than reality, and almost fantastical, mimicking the female eyes that we are so used to seeing in animated films and features, from Disney to the Japanese cartoons on which she is said to have modelled this look. The video is fascinating, and of itself a work of art; Anastasiya carefully and masterfully uses shades and techniques to create the impression that her eye is significantly wider and rounder than it is, and of itself – in the cocoon of the video, for the 6 minutes you will watch this transformation happen – this is impressive.

But step back from the film, and the story is less appealing. Anastasiya is only 19, and we know little about her other than that she expressly wants to reproduce the Japanese ‘anime’ wide-eyed, large-headed look, to the extent that she has adopted a Japanese name, has reportedly lost weight (she is around 6 stone, reports say), and is said to be considering surgery on her eyes to make them permanently larger. The ‘art’ of her make-up skills suddenly seems less appealing – and grotesque, even – while the thought that younger, impressionable girls (who have been brought up to believe that the doe-eyed Disney look equates to beauty and desirability) might consider adopting this radical approach to their appearance, is quite sinister.

For better or worse – actually, for worse – Anastasiya has become defined in the public eye (and to a large extent, watching her other videos, in her own eyes) by her appearance, and little else seems of importance about her. In itself, this is a terrible message to be sending out, and although many of the comments on her activity reflect that people feel uncomfortable with the unreality of her appearance, many do not, and even those who do, often fall into the trap of commenting largely on how she appears, rather than who she is, and why she is portraying herself as she does. She is of course a real person, and we need a reality check here. As Art, there is nothing wrong with what Anastasiya is doing. As an example to others, however, there is something very wrong. Moreover, looking at the sponsors’ trailers, there is evidence that this may turn into a means of employment for her, and this should make us very uncomfortable, as we witness, once again, the reinforcing, of the connection we have built between success for women and (a narrow definition of) their physical ‘beauty’.

But then maybe I am wrong. Maybe we need such extreme examples to show us how we have gone too far in focusing on women’s external appearance as one of the prime ways by which we judge them. Maybe we need such grotesqueness, masquerading as Art, to shake our sensibilities, and to help us grow up and move beyond the tyranny that grips women – and increasingly men – and that focuses far, far more on how they look than on what they do.

Here’s hoping.

 

Oct 20

Why everyone should experience Shakespearean drama

This has been a very Shakespearean-themed week at St Mary’s Calne. On Monday evening, a group of Year 9 girls battled illness, stormy weather and the curse of the Scottish play to present a succinct and striking Macbeth to a full house at the Egg Theatre in Bath, as part of the Shakespeare Schools’ Festival. I congratulate them all – from an impressive Macbeth and Lady Macbeth to two deadly witches, the entire cast was worthy of praise. Well done!

From Tuesday onwards, our school focus then turned to Hamlet, as our annual school production took place – four performances, with two casts, over three days, involving a third of the school. Twelve hours of Hamlet in all, and I was there for every glorious minute. It was a veritable tour de force: a magnificent feat. The girls are to be congratulated, and although I dare not single out one particular individual (even though both Hamlets were truly breathtaking – exceptional), I reserve a special congratulations for our Year 13 girls, whose acting was so strong, and utterly spellbinding.

Why should anyone in this day and age continue to watch Shakespeare, however – and Shakespearean tragedy, at that? Well, at the risk of sounding like a shortened A Level English essay, there are several reasons, ranging from the cultural to the linguistic, but primarily because Shakespeare touches on, and immerses us in, what it means to be human. His work has passed the test of time because of his skills in portraying the human condition, and the paradoxes of what it means to live on this earth:

“What a piece of work is man, how noble in reason, how infinite in faculties, in form and in moving, how express and admirable in action, how like an angel in apprehension, how like a god: the beauty of the world, the paragon of animals. And yet to me, what is this quintessence of dust?” (Hamlet, Act 2 Scene 2)

What indeed? Well, despite the fogs of depression and madness to which we all (not just Hamlet) succumb at times, man – mankind, humankind – is a true marvel, and this was absolutely captured for all of us who saw these performances by the wonderful girls of St Mary’s Calne. No-one could have put this better than their legendary Director of Drama, Miss Lilian Leadbetter, who wrote this:

“There is no better theatrical universe in which to be immersed than that of Shakespeare – and Hamlet, arguably the greatest of all revenge tragedies, stands at the axis of his work, a towering presence. There are no subjects or thoughts about the human condition in Hamlet which are not references, illuminated or imbued with the most profound insights by Shakespeare, the greatest of all dramatists.

From the tormented soul of Hamlet, ‘sweet prince’ and reluctant avenger, we are given an overwhelming sense of fragmentation and alienation; yet he presents us with the most poignant and beautiful portrayal of human existence. It has been an honour to enter and explore the world of Prince Hamlet. Only with the very best of “new Elizabethans”, the great actors and students of St Mary’s Calne, might we take on the challenge – travelling ‘light years’ across the Renaissance universe – with a ‘double ensemble’ – in just seven weeks.”

Hear, hear! Bravo, St Mary’s Calne!

Oct 17

“We’re students, not slags”. Utterly shocking stories from our universities

I was shocked when I recently read this article by Laura Bates in the Independent. I had read the original article by the same journalist in the previous week’s paper, which looked at the sexist and misogynist antics reported by numbers of students as taking place in Freshers’ Weeks at universities across the country, and that was shocking enough. This follow-up article made it clear that these were not isolated occurrences; Ms Bates was overwhelmed by the number of people who reported similar events – “a deluge of similar stories from hundreds of students”.

What have we done as a society to prepare our young people for university and for adulthood? Clearly not nearly enough if this is how they behave – rape-victim themed parties, events where flashing is a required, or women are pressured into taking off their tops and behaving for all the world as if their sole reason for existence was to be labelled as sexual objects. The argument that this is “just a bit of fun” does not wash in any way; under no circumstances can it ever be right to make fun of rape, for instance. Both men and women can be complicit in these activities; but so too are the universities themselves, who have a responsibility – the main responsibility for the next few years, in fact – for the education, both academic and social, of these particular students.

Universities need to sharpen up: as Laura Bates writes, “these reports suggest a disturbing culture of female students facing sexual objectification and demeaning labels, and the use of such names for official university and student union events sends a powerful message by implying the institutions’ acceptance or approval of this culture.” Is this really how our universities want to be perceived? I suspect not – in fact, I know not. But they are being tarnished by the brush of misogyny. Just as university departments are now having to lay on remedial Maths lessons to cope with the results of grade inflation in our public examinations system, perhaps they need to lay on remedial social lessons to counter the relentless pressures in society that are undermining our drive as a civilisation towards a fairer, more respectful community. In any case, they have to be far, far tougher on students who act in such a way as to degrade women.

It is evident, of course, that we have done something right as a society if enough people feel uncomfortable about these sorts of events to be able to complain. At least we are no longer under the impression, as Jimmy Savile’s victims were – probably correctly – in the Seventies, namely that no-one would listen to them, believe them, or take them seriously. Now we just need to act on these complaints, and make sure we stop this kind of appalling behaviour for good.